You make us laugh

Dear Malia,

You can make us laugh, you will talk about the most random thing!  We were sitting around the dinner table having our Sunday dinner, we were taking turns telling stories when out of the blue you said "Lauren tuted in Walmart"  I turned to you and replied  "she did, and what did you do?" 
"I laugh" then you covered your mouth with your hand and did an opened mouth laugh!  The whole table laughed with you, you had shared a memory with us!  We felt like we were apart of your world for a moment.  Then it was over, you turned to your food and didn't share anymore. 

You were invited to a birthday party, you don't like birthday parties, especially your own.  I was thrilled that you had been invited, at age 7 this was your second birthday party that you've been invited to! But I was unsure what to do.  This boy was in your school class, but his needs aren't as sever as yours, I decided to have you pick him out a present and I would go with you to the party.  As soon as we pulled up to his driveway you started to panic!  You could hear the kids playing in the backyard as we exited the car, you reached up for me to carry you and I did.  As we rang the doorbell you heard a dog bark, the door opened and you burst into tears.  Your legs wrapped around my waist and your arms clung to my neck.  You buried your head in my neck and I knew there was no way we were going to be staying for the birthday party.  Your teacher was there and she tried to console  you, but we all knew there was little anyone could do for you at that point.  I gave him his birthday present and I apologized and said goodbye to everyone. 

A sadness came over me as we drove the 2 miles to our home.  Why?  What?  How?  I has so many questions, I wanted to understand, I wanted to know what scares you so about parties.  Maybe it was the unfamiliar home, or all the people, maybe it was the dog.  You had been so happy to pick him our a present, you had acted happy to go, but your anxiety stands in the way!  Helpless and defeated we enter our home, Timbrlee and Breckell ask why were were home so soon and you run up to your room ready to be alone in your own world of books and cards.  I am sad, not for the party, but for you, wishing I could understand you, talk with you about, so sad for the lonely world you live in.